Home Satire You Have No Idea How Much You Have Helped Me
Home Satire You Have No Idea How Much You Have Helped Me

You Have No Idea How Much You Have Helped Me

Dear Supporters,

In this election we set out to change the paradigms not only of what an election is but of what an election can be. Your grass roots have exemplified not only the best of this campaign but the best of America. Your work on my behalf has turned the web from the 'Internet' into the 'Obamanet', getting the word out to millions of ordinary Digg using Americans on my behalf.

There are too many of you to thank individually but there are some whose contributions are just too notable to ignore.

First of all to Jeff Pflegner, your Huffington Post articles backed by six years of experience as Personal Assistant to Gwyneth Paltrow continue to provide an informative source of knowledge and your coining the phrase "Jolf McHitler" to describe my opponent has provided a major boost for my campaign among Alex Jones listeners.

To "Zobama4Life", your obsessive submission of mainstream media stories on John McCain to Digg that had already been submitted, with names such as "JOHN MCCANE IS A LYING LIAR WHO WANTS TO BOMB IREAN" has really helped fuel the groundswell of my campaign. Continuing to do this even though you were banned twice while still getting them to the front page of Digg really demonstrates your commitment to my campaign. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

To Morgan Harcourt, your blogs on my official BarackObama site on our relationship with Israel, the Zionist plot behind 9/11, the real story behind Jews drinking the blood of babies as well as your other informative pieces have touched me more than I can express. In the absence of Jeremiah Wright, I consider you my Jeremiah Wright. And be sure to give a shout out for me to all your peeps in the National Vanguard and ZioWatch forums.

Then to the guy who photoshopped naked pictures of Sarah Palin, thank you, your assistance to my campaign has been truly invaluable. Also thank you to the guy who insists on posting 'Slut' in the comments for every story on her. You have no idea how much this is helping me with female voters.

To the guy who pretends to be a conservative and posts racist comments about me on every YouTube video, thank you. That is exactly the kind of out of the box thinking that my campaign really needs.

To the thousands of Hamas supporters who manned the phone banks, sent checks to me and entered chat rooms under names such as 'AvrageAmericanWoman03' and 'HakimAmerican' to try and encourage random people to vote for me by threatening them with beheading, thank you. Also your videos of pretending to behead McCain in effigy have given people another reason to vote for me.

Finally to the white guy who dresses up like Che while working behind the counter at Orange Julius and harangues customers to vote for me, thank you. Even though you work in a mostly black neighborhood, you've succeeded in persuading dozens of customers and passerby to instead vote for Carolyn McKinney, Ralph Nader, Bob Barr and cast write in votes for 'Fire that Che lookalike Mutha_____ who works behind the Orange Julius counter.' Thank you, your dedication to my campaign will not go unrewarded.

You have all done a great deal for me, more than I could have possibly expected. You have no idea how much you have helped me. I would like to leave you with one final message.

God damn you and god damn America


Barack Obama


  1. I am convinced Barack Obama would be very bad for this country if he is elected president. I do not know how anyone with a love and appreciation of history could vote for him in November.

    On the other hand, why should I vote for John McCain? Only because Barack Obama is worse? Why should I continue voting for the lesser of the evils? It is still voting for evil; yes?

    Senator McCain has made it abundantly clear, he will seek to negotiate with this arch-terrorist, Mahmoud Abbas. McCain, like Bush, will seek to weaken, undermine, dismember and ultimately destroy Israel.

    Since 911, we've seen two new Muslim terror states established in the region; Gaza and Lebanon. A President McCain (as well as a President Obama) will seek to extend Gaza's reach into Israel's strategic and vital mountainous heartland which protects the slender state's eastern flank.

    Pre-911 this would be insane. Post 911 this not only insane, it beyond belief! It is incredibly stupid and moronic! But I have come to expect little more than insanity and imbecility from President Bush. Now it appears John McCain will follow Bush's lead.

    Why should I vote for this only to be angered and disappointed?

  2. because voting for the lesser of two evils lessens the damage, particularly when the gap between them is that far apart

    it's called triage and it's what politics is about

    you vote for people who will do less damage to give us a fighting chance

  3. Since before the 2004 Republican national party convention, I was put in touch with Cathie Adams, Texas delegate to the national platform writing committee. I guess Cathie is what we would call a Christian Zionist. She is Texas State Committeewoman. She speaks to groups about radical Islam.

    Cathie fought against this language -- which calls for Bush's vision of a Muslim (terror) state in the Holy Land -- in 2004 and again late last month. Both times her motion to strike this unconscionable, immoral language from the GOP platform was voted down by other members of the committee.

    She was able to insert the following last month:

    "We support Jerusalem as the undivided capital of Israel and moving the American embassy up to Jerusalem."


    This is a deal-breaker for the Muslim world but it seems to me if McCain is determined to establish a Palestinian-killer state in Israel this will simply be ignored by his administration.

    I cannot help but believe, voting for either McCain or Obama is voting for a jihadist state in Israel.

  4. Steve, we have to vote for someone in November because if we don't it's more likely than not that the greater of the evils (Obama) will get in.

    I doubt the US would move its embassy to Jerusalem at this point; the situation as it stands now is a powderkeg about to go off.

    Israel needs to stand firm on its own right now without interference from the US or EU.

    BTW: I was pleased to hear Rudy Guiliani in his speech cite everything I was concerned about--Obama wanting to divide Israel, the moral equivalence of comparing the nation of Israel to the Palestinian Authority, even the Berlin speech, which I feel a lot of people overlooked.

    McCain isn't ideal but he sure is a hell of a lot better than Obama. And if you don't vote for McCain, Obama will win by default.

    The US and Israel will pay heavily.

  5. On a lighter note :)

    I think Sarah Palin has caused Obama to feel a bit dejected.

    Think about it--he was the young rising star with the fresh face for two years. Now another face comes along, relatively out of the blue. She prettier, a more eloquent speaker, beautiful family.

    She has an identity. You can attach things to her--pro-life, pro-creationism, pro-gun rights. You can't name three things Obama is for or against.

    Obama must be feeling like a hasbeen at this point. As they say about certain models on America's Next Top Model, he doesn't look "fresh" anymore.

    As the saying goes, "Everybody loves a kitten but who wants another cat?" Obama is just another cat now.

    Call it Obama Fatigue, but that's what people seem to feel now that Sarah Palin has come on the scene.

  6. it's not helping certainly, Obama wanted to be the celebrity and now he has to compete for room in the spotlight

  7. For that reason alone Palin was a good choice. It's good McCain kept her in the wings for so long.

    Already women are clamoring to get eyeglasses like Palin wears, not interested it seems in Michelle Obama's Jackie O pearls, hairstyle and dresses.

    It could very well be that the Obamas were merely the flavors of the month.

  8. Hi. This is somewhat OT but WOW. I'm watching a rebroadcast of an interview George Stephanopolous did with Barack Obama on ABC's "This Week."

    Obama refers to "my Muslim faith" George immediately corrected him and said, "Your Christian faith."

    That interview has to be somewhere on You Tube.

    I can't believe Obama admitted that he's a Muslim on national television.

    Sorry. I didn't know where else to post this and I am shocked beyond belief that it slipped out of Obama's mouth so easily and that Stephanopolous corrected him so smoothly rather than pausing and questioning him about it.

  9. this is the video


  10. Keli Ata, please follow me:

    1)Dear Senator McCain....
    by Gerald A. Honigman

    "While many are taking Barack Obama to task for ties to Black anti-Semites, Baker is cut from this same mold."

    Here's my dilemma.

    Dear Senator John McCain,

    I have followed your career fairly closely over the years, often with pride. So, here's my dilemma.

    Coming home from work recently, I heard on the news that James Baker III has endorsed your candidacy. The problem emerges from your end of this story. Please read these excerpts from a Jason Maoz article on May 12, 2006 in JewishPress.com:

    McCain told Haaretz that as president, he would "micromanage" US policy toward Israel... would dispatch "the smartest guy I know" to the region....

    Asked who that "smartest guy" might be, McCain responded: "Brent Scowcroft, or James Baker, though I know that you in Israel don't like Baker."

    McCain... indicated Israel would be expected to "defend itself and keep evacuating." Asked whether that meant "movement toward the June 4, 1967 armistice lines, with minor modifications," McCain "nodded in the affirmative."

    Before dealing with this, there's something even more troublesome. Imagine the response if you appointed someone to a high position who openly stated, "F**** the Blacks, they don't vote for us anyway," and who referred to Black employees and colleagues as his "Black boys."

    Nauseating, disastrous thought; not so?

    Baker has said those very things about Jews.

    While many are taking Barack Obama to task for ties to Black anti-Semites, Baker is cut from this same mold..... http://www.israelnationalnews.com/Articles/Article.aspx/7816

    2) US presidential candidates to honour 9/11 victims

    Washington - Putting aside partisan politics, the two US presidential candidates are to appear together on September 11, the seventh anniversary of the terrorist attacks in New York and Washington. Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama and his Republican rival John McCain have planned a visit to New York on Thursday, their campaigns announced Saturday..... http://www.earthtimes.org/articles/show/230140,us-presidential-candidates-to-honour-911-victims.html

    3) Saudi Arabia, Princes Immune From 9/11 Suit, 2nd Circuit Rules

    "William H. Jeffress Jr. of Baker Botts (that is, James Baker III - Botts) in Washington, D.C., represented Princes Salman, Sultan and Naif."

    By Mark Hamblett
    New York Law Journal
    August 15, 2008

    The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia and four of its princes cannot be sued for funding Muslim charities that funneled money to al-Qaida in the period leading up to the 2001 terror attacks, a federal appeals court ruled Thursday.....

    The plaintiffs were a collection of 9/11 victims and their families as well as major insurance companies and property owners, including the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey.

    Second Circuit Judges Dennis Jacobs and Jose Cabranes and, sitting by designation, Eastern District of New York Judge Eric Vitaliano said the act "most obviously" protects the Kingdom itself.

    But the circuit held for the first time that the act "applies to individual officials of foreign governments in their official capacities," a ruling that means immunity for Prince Salman bin Abdulaziz al-Saud, president of the commission; Crown Prince Sultan bin Abdulaziz al-Saud, chairman of the Supreme Council of Islamic Affairs; Prince Naif bin Abdulaziz al-Saud, interior minister; and Prince Turki al-Faisal bin Abdulaziz al-Saud, director of the Department of General Intelligence.

    In its ruling Thursday, the circuit upheld an opinion of the late Southern District of New York Judge Richard C. Casey that there was no personal jurisdiction over the four princes.

    In the circuit's 67-page decision, Jacobs said even if the princes were "reckless in monitoring how their donations were spent, or could or did foresee that recipients of their donations would attack targets in the United States, that would be insufficient to ground the exercise of personal jurisdiction."

    That language was tough to swallow for Justin T. Green of Kreindler & Kreindler, one of several lawyers who represented the plaintiffs.

    "We're very concerned about the standard this case sets on jurisdiction," he said. "The court said that even if they could foresee the attacks that wasn't enough. That's a very tough standard."

    William H. Jeffress Jr. of Baker Botts in Washington, D.C., represented Princes Salman, Sultan and Naif.

    "Obviously this is a welcome ruling -- they upheld the district court on every point except the ones they didn't have to reach," Jeffress said. "My clients have felt from the beginning offended that they would be accused of knowingly assisting Osama bin Laden. They stripped him of his citizenship, kicked him out of the country and seized his assets over 10 years ago. I know there may be a petition for certiorari to the Supreme Court, but this is a big step toward the successful conclusion of the case....." http://www.law.com/jsp/article.jsp?id=1202423808995

  11. Steve we've gone over this ad naseum

    you don't seem to grasp the concept of the lesser evil, which means these discussions are as dead ended as they always are

  12. I understand the concept you are making. You will not be voting for John McCain because you believe he is good or will do good but because he is not as bad or evil as Obama.

    Clearly, from a purely selfish standpoint, a President Obama will be very bad for this country, for a whole host of reasons. Obama will seek to confiscate our money and our property and redistribute it to others, in keeping with his socialist world view. For this reason alone I cannot vote for him. Then there is the issue of national security. Obama will project weakness -- not unlike Jimmy Carter -- to our enemies. I am a social conservative. Thus I do not like Obama's extreme social-liberal views.

    It is hard to tell who will be worse for Israel. A case can be made that these puppet-leaders in Israel will have a difficult time making the case that a President Obama is a friend and can be trusted, like they've made with Bush and will no doubt attempt to make with a President McCain. For some on the right in Israel, little doubt, Obama could be a "perverse" blessing in disguise as Israel's traitorous leaders need a faux friend in the White House to lean on in order to continue their treachery.

    With Obama in the White House, they would have great difficulty making this case. It is possible, Israel will be on her own in a sense.

    If I had to vote today, I would probably turn the page. In your view, this is wrong. I've got a few weeks to think and pray about it. I cannot get past the notion that voting for either of these two men is voting for Israel's dismemberment in order to appease our enemies, because that is the object of both these men.

  13. It is not hard to tell who is worse for Israel. Obama is a radical leftist who has been prepped by forces unknown, McCain will continue Bush's existing policies toward Israel.

    "A case can be made that these puppet-leaders in Israel will have a difficult time making the case that a President Obama is a friend and can be trusted, like they've made with Bush and will no doubt attempt to make with a President McCain"

    You've tried to make this case before and it's gone nowhere. Read Haaretz if you think there will be any such "difficulties". The Peres types will love Obama far more.

    On top of that with a "hostile" President they'd have the excuse of American pressure to lean on for their policies.

    I cannot get past the notion that voting for either of these two men is voting for Israel's dismemberment in order to appease our enemies

    The object of one of these men is the partial dismemberment of Israel. The object of the other is the complete destruction of Israel.

  14. Further dismemberment of Israel -- at McCain's or Obama's prodding -- could mean mass-slaughter of Jews. Israel is already surrounded by well-armed jihadist regimes to the north in Lebanon and to her south in Gaza. Thousands of rockets are positioned in south Lebanon. Hamas has thousands of rockets as well.

    Shimon Peres is (I do not use the term lightly) a traitor. Thousands of innocent Jews have been murdered because of his Oslo treachery. When will the Jews in Israel wake up? What will it take? A slaughter on an unprecedented scale?

    Caroline Glick acknowledges in her column today, the majority of Jews in Israel will withdraw from the "West Bank," leaving it in the hands of these killers and at their mercy.

    With this in mind, is it any wonder this traitorous Kadima party might continue in power for some time to come, with an incredibly weak woman at the helm? Have the Jews learned anything from our cruel history?

  15. Not could, it will mean mass slaughter of Jews. The difference is the schedule, which means how many years Israel has to recover and save itself. With McCain it can be 10-15 years. With Obama it may be limited to his own term.

    "When will the Jews in Israel wake up?"

    When they get the leadership that directs them toward useful action. That's what's missing.

    Israel has once again been hijacked by a corrupt government funded behind the scenes with the intent of "legitimizing" Israel in order to do business

    israel needs either a domestic political or more conventional revolution to defeat them and survive

  16. Sultan, you wrote: "When they get the leadership that directs them toward useful action. That's what's missing."

    I would agree, leadership is critical but this is where we may partially disagree. While good leadership is critical, this in no way absolves "the people" of responsibility.

    When polls demonstrate, majorities of Jews in Israel are willing to withdraw from our God-given land, this constitutes a huge problem.

    'Well', you could properly say, 'the traitorous leaders and the leftist, collaborating media is misleading the people' as some on the right argue.

    This in no way absolves the Jews -- or any people for that matter. This has been the excuse we heard and hear from Germans. "Our leaders brain-washed us and fed us all this false propaganda about the Jews and other things."

    We Jews are a great people. Many of us, most of us, know our obligations before God. We, as a people cannot plead ignorance on Yom Kippur. We cannot say, "Oh God, I did not know it was wrong to break covenant!"

    The land of Israel is our covenant. Evil leaders do not excuse doing evil by the people, especially when these evil leaders (these traitorous parties) are brought to power and sustained in part by the will of the people.

  17. Hi Sultan. I see you did not display my last post.

  18. I put up comments when I have free time

    Holding people en masse "responsible" doesn't solve or achieve anything, and I would be wary of the legitimacy of any polls in the present day Israeli press.

  19. Didn't Obama once compare himself to Jesus Christ? More like the anti-Christ methinks!


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